The Antidote - Happiness for people who cant stand positive thinking - Oliver Burkeman
Summary
- He explores the general idea that if you deliberately pursue happiness as a goal, you tend not to achieve it. Happiness is more a side effect of other actions.
How I discovered it
- I really enjoyed Oliver Burkemans other book Time management for mortals - Oliver Burkeman, so this was a natural progression.
How the book changed me
- The basic lesson here is that if you just do what the bible says, you will be happy. A lot of dead ends and fruitless pursuit of happiness eventually comes back to the same conclusion. Things like financial and physical security do not bring happiness. Just having a 'positive atttitude' does not automatically get us ahead. On the other hand, having a hope for the future, helping others and enjoying good relations with our neighbours does.
Details
- Develop at least 3 routines a day for maximum happiness
- Supply and demand - the more people do something, the less valuable it is - Derek Siver. Self-discipline is hard to attain, so having self-discipline makes you a rare commodity that can lead to better financial status.
- Sleep is good for you
- Hedonic adaptation - We quickly become accustomed to any new source of pleasure
- Things will not out for the best, but they will also go less wrong than you thought.
- Confront the reality of our limited control over events
- Focus on accomplishing work, rather than being in the mood to accomplish work
- Specific goals can be counter productive
- Dont wait for perfect circumstances, start with what you have now
- Principle of affordable loss
- Trying to feel safe does not bring happiness
- Fixed theory vs Incremental theory
- Why did Roman generals have a slave follow them and repeat 'Memento mori'?
Quotes
- No matter what your goal or project, never allow yourself to miss two days in a row - Leo Babauta
- The palest ink is more reliable than the most powerful memory - Chinese proverb
- Inspiration is for amateurs, the rest of us just show up and get to work - Chuck Close
- The continued existence of complex interactive systems depends upon preventing the maximisation of any variable - Bateson
- Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken - Oliver Burkeman
- The more you try to avoid suffering, the more you suffer - Thomas Merton
- Poverty has crippled Kibera but it is not the pity-inducing cry for help that NGOs would have you believe - Jean-Pierre Larroque
- A good traveler - Lao Tzu