Ask 'what did I miss' to engage people
Summary
- Offer impressions of someones view of a matter, then ask 'what did i miss?'
- After they explain, say 'What else did I miss?'
Details
- People like to correct others, so majority will be happy to talk
- It also allows others to voice what is important to them
- It forces us to see things in others viewpoints
References
Quotes
From that point on, whenever he discussed something with anyone at work, he would start by offering his impressions of how the other person saw things. Then he would ask, “What did I miss?” Asking this question is a clever move. It implies that he’s open to correction and gives the other person a chance to correct him. One of the deepest-rooted human instincts is to correct other people, so by asking this question, he makes it easy for the other person to engage with him. Then, if the other person does in fact correct him, it reveals to him which factors are most important to that person. When the other person is done answering that first question, my friend still doesn’t offer his own thoughts right away. He first asks a follow-up: “What else did I miss?” This approach to interpersonal communication is an example of a reference-shifting safeguard. Asking the two questions, and listening to the answers people give him, forces him to see things through other people’